CREEPY - PART II

Im so drained... i only have 6 hours of sleep more or less...i got home around 3 am..

my goodness, im so lethargic... how i wanted not to appear in the office, i wanted to sleep more...

but today is reporting day, there are lots of things need to be done and should not be delayed also.  When we are on our way home, the streets are all so empty, if there's a car it can be count...and im afraid something might happen.. but i trust the people around with me... im blessed to work with this people, learn from them, and boost my confidence...in the past i haven't seen myself to be really lingering in this industry... im a Computer enthusiast , funny thing is i ended up working in Tourism industry... i enjoy this kind of pursuit, but sometimes it takes all your energy , you need to sustain more from yourself so in times work needed you to exert more you still have the balls to do it... before i always make mistake but actually i twice did that mistake, after that i managed not to do that again... i set a high standard in my work, im so workaholic...work is work for me... just like when i was still studying... study is study...friends is friends... both different in my life... the first thing is my love and life while the second gives the spice...

I get this working attitude and habit from my college life... we are pushed to the limit and so stress, we need to meet the deadline or else the line for us will be dead...its all or nothing every time we defend thesis, make reports book & chapter ...

it will drive me crazy... when i was still a freshmen, i was freaking out, i always sleep late, then wake up so early, the result , when i got to the room all of my hair is blown up... how creepy was that...? thanks to my friends and proofs they love me...^^ oh yeah, got that right, im friendly back then but devilish to others specially bullies who bully the weak...but during our time, there's no bully's in our batch... i had the great batch ever in my life... all awesome and true circle of friends...

I can recall my life before...house-school-house, my parents are so strict, that i cant go out anywhere after school...

So that serve as the reason why i  am so uptight with my self...and to how i dedicate myself to what im into...

im so tired today, im playing with my favorite game, it drives all the stress away... plus i am not busy work right now, I've had my coffee... and thank no work load in the table so i can recover some of my energy taken from me last night report...^^

hmmm i can smell something really soo spooky... almost Halloween im super excited...its a trick or treat everyone...

everything seems to remind me of this... 

"I WONT GO HOME WITHOUT YOU..."

#there is still part III because i cant think of anything right now due to tiredness...im freaking out

creepy part - 1

If i was into something,i dedicate all my time with it...i was kinda torn between my passion and opportunity , while deprive from love and was opened by happiness...

such a pathetic line... but so true right now... im still a dreamer...

some of my goals are still popping up and ramping in my mind...still, i will wait and strive hard just to see the other side of the world...maybe im so ambitious , but that dream gives me the strength to work harder so i can do that someday, for now, i cant... i really dont know what to write right now...^^ how creepy...i run out of words to say, well i was struck by boredom...

I used to see my friends before, but now i can only communicate with them through networking sites...i badly wanted us to have a reunion but cant make it, *sigh* they are all busy, so as me...

i was thinking how life will be in the future?... i just dont know i have this bad feeling... 

its almost the end of the month... it feels like the  year is fast passing us by. i cant even sleep for an hour counting the sheep that are profound, when i wake up it feels like i just sleep for a minute... days - weeks - months...they all so fast fading... but still happy, cause i know i spend it well... im happy, i can show more from myself now, not like before... i always hold back, always reluctant to all i do because i wanted to gain who i am right now, now my parents given me my freedom to express how i feel...do what i want...but still i was used to their strict habits, so im prim now than before, i was like, "hey!i love who you raise me, no need to change a thing" 

oh i happen to remember the topic... i want to share my favorite artist here since i already reveal my passion... let's start with music...i will show some list:

• RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS
• BON JOVI
• SCORPIONS
• AIR SUPPLY
• LIFE HOUSE
• SIMPLE PLAN
• MAROON 5
• SECONDHAND SERENADE
• PARAMORE
• HEY MONDAY
• MATCHBOX 20
• LINKIN PARK
• THE SCRIPT
• LIL WAYNE
• LINKA
• FM STATIC
• FABER DRIVE
• GREY HOUNDZ
• SLAP SHOCK
• WOLFGANG
• MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE
• INCUBUS
• CREED
• RUNNER RUNNER
• JAMES BLUNT
• MIKE POSNER
• GREEN DAY

the rest i will tell you next time...haha im empty minded with all the band names...how sad huh?...^^

so i guess we still have part two...

right swag of my taste

Exactly 84 days left before Christmas strikes the day...im super darn excited sweetie...

so since the time zone states today in Philippines is already OCT. !'2011...its the first day of the month...im thinking a lot of activities and goals to achieve this month...last September i've been surfing alot movies and musics that i love most to do...and i decided to share all the movies i've been busy for the past month some of the movies was old but really i watched some of those almost 3 times cause i really love those...atmost...i've fulfilles my goal for almost a year that i will stay happy and grounded as i am, to be humble enough...yeah thats true, maybe i dont live on a perfect life but all those things events people and opportunities came by to drag me to where i am right now is a whole lot of fun sweetie...^^  all the food...also taste great and worth the cost...SATISFIED! and all the time i spent going to church with my family also a blessing... to all the hurts that caused me to somehow forgot my coolness also cool enough to start a new...well, year also fast forwarding that there are 91 days and 17 hours left before we say bye to 2011...All was Worth It!

when i was winding up a week ago to sort things out that has blown out of proportion as i think of it i came up to a fact that all i've think and all i've decided for myself are not harming anybody around me, and also if it does sound a lil'bit offensive to be straight forward well, its not my fault anymore because i've never harm any body in the cycle...and thats what im proud of my self, i got to deal on keeping every decisions i've made the way it should be and the way i wanted and not ruining it...maybe im too stiff on myself, but for me thats how i set my mind and thats how i live my life to be happy...there are times i feel alone because of the fact that im single but thats not an issue...its never been anyway...

hmmm...i think my goal for this october is to post my picture here in my blog and to cut my hair...yepey! i've been looking forward to that day ever! gosh... hah ^^

today is saturday and i got this super delish! foods from Majestic Robinson's Cebu Talisay  wanna share my fav. cravings of the day...remember... "dont droll hah ^^"

chicken soup / thumbs up!

this is first put in a container and if you want to order this soup they will put it in a bowl then heat up then oooozzzing with soo much taste of heaven hah ^^ kidding !

perfect noodles for the soup

this is also part of their recipe, if you want to...you can put this one on your soup then Olah! a yummy chicken noodle soup sweetie...^^

potatoes and the green vegies!

if you are like me who love to eat vegies well this is perfect for your cravings...potatoes and those sinful onions oh my! i dont want to spit out every single i have on all of this food...awesomeness! 

chelsea Greek salad...

oh yeah! you are not mistaken...this is also another form of veggie salad that i love aside from those leafy green salad seasoned with the violet one...this one taste good that much than the other one...

and the maccarons spag

swag is just right for this spag! yah! hah ^^ this is more bloody than the other food we order...i choose this one...than the expensive one haha im too skinflint you know i dont have that enough money still dont have my salary for the month...

if you are wondering why all that food i order are vegies well...im a scrooge and i dont have enough money hahahha well thats the hurtful truth man...im looking forward to an awesome weekend and for a wonderful October... muaaaah give me some love...love...love...love...

give my soul a break ^^

Woaaah! at last im back blogging again...im buzzing around again fella! well, i sort kinda busy with some stuffs this past dew days... i was watching this movie and i finish watching the series just this afternoon, since i got a time in the office to chill for a movie sneak peak ..hah ^^ cool it is! i got a free time cause im not that busy, im almost with all the work for a week last wed. so i did use my time to watch the movie... sorry but i cant say what is the title, you know "movies" is one of my treasures and truth to that is i haven't come up with a good idea on how i elaborate on the movies im working on that made me a lazy bum to visit and blog for something... hah ^^ 

i had all the fun with my parents and my brother when i spent the ME TIME for almost a year...yeah, its been a while since i've seen my friends because i dedicate my time after work for my family and to myself...i dont want to miss any single event my family is going through whether its too simple or complicated...

I scolded my self and bump my own head with my palm while bending at my table after i wrote something about complaining everything...

I know and i realize im just getting too emotional and too carried away by my blues in life...I didnt realize all the things i complain before was the reason why im so much full of happiness...so i give my self a break and 

rewind everything...then at some point again in my life i did forgot all of this just because im having tantrums...how sad isn't it? hah ^^ just give yourself and soul a break for a while so you can appreciate all whats happening and whats going on with our life...dont full yourself too much or else it will spill out...

i got to taste this one since this was from Mc...and it taste good...love it...i miss eating my favorite chocolate so i got some Chocolate drink woaaah! i could still taste it in my throat...yummmy all the way 

Enjoy! 

my life movie and its music - part I

i love movies & music the most...almost all my time if i have my day off from work all of my spare time goes to watching movies...and the movies i love the most is HOLLYWOOD movies, and Taiwanese movies...i just dont know how did i end up loving Taiwanese film,for me there is one specific and certain spice in Taiwan movies...even there t.v series i also watch them when i have a break in the office i just cant take that into my circulation. 

there are lots of movies i've seen and they are all amazing! these past few days i havent wrote anything because im still finishing the movie...

when it comes to movies and music , its like my baby...no one can ever pull that off out of me...both are connected in my world. all my dvd's and tapes i dont want them to be borrowed, hah that is how im so obsessed in music and movies...thats simply me, but behind all that simplicity is the thought that whenever i did wrong, feel aloof , scared , mad, angry and feels no one to turn to and feels the world turn their back at me i just simply put my earphones...play the music and boom! i feel fine and at ease...thats the difference between friends and your passion...friends leaves you and sometimes at the most important time of your life, but your passion never ever can be pulled out of you. maybe not all people understand what im talking about...but in 21 years of living in this world, gone through all those struggles in life as growing up, i've seen and deal and meet lots of different personality and the different faces of a person.

some goes and you cant say some stay...because practically speaking they all come and goes just like our owed life...it can be live once so why chase those people who come and just goes? whats the deal? well, for some they have an answer to that but to me i still dont believe in in such philosophy about people stays by your side for the rest of our lives. not all people understand music really well, if they can sing, they think they are good enough and they are musicians, but they dont know what really music means to real born musicians...all can sing and dance but not all have the passion and heart on understanding and loving that gift...see what i mean? ^^ im too into something that no one understand me, im just too concern to the people around me to not let them get hurt and put them first...before anything else...

then suddenly i get tired on that feeling, im not selfish anyway...am i? i do whatever they want me to do, go to school, listen to what they say, never embarrass them, be a good daughter, finish my studies and be a woman with self dignity, and i can say im one of a kind because of them, but i grew tired already, i lost my will to still pursue that day...because all i want is to enjoy my spare time and enjoy what i love, why cant they let me free for a while...its just im too pressure on things...its true that sometimes i feel useless, yah i have a job but i cant still go to place i want to, im too old to mingle...still im left alone...no one dares to court me or to be friend me because they are intimidated by what i become now, why cant i have real friend that wont ask pathetic things in life hah maybe thats how it ends...im just too complicated on things...

 im successful but im not happy..haha now i can say that? it takes so long for me to say im not happy at certain things in my life nw...i dont ask for more i just want to live life simply the way i want...^^ but im almost there already...just a little more sacrifices...when im done i can live my life the way i just love to live it...thank you God for another day of contentment... 

misapprehend

i really love siomai...i ate this when i fell my throat is craving for a coke
and if im totally aloof...

Though i dont have much more to say about whats going on with my life i still love sharing what my perspective each day i live by...

After all the troubles, i left it behind with a whole heart and with willingness , why?cause its not easy and not healthy to live a life full of virus, haha i mean full of negative vibes... i dont want that heavy feeling because it makes my head ache and i cant think that much , i dont want that annoying feeling...i just dont want to deal with so much drama in life... we all have problems but its on us on how we handle things... 

After all, at the end of the day all you will have is yourself...well,for me thats my opinion...hmmm let me say,im 21 now but still a bachelor,haven't fall in love so deeply yet, but had a much more deeper views about love...how was that huh? =O 

some say its weird and its a lie if i say i dont have a boyfriend... i wanna squeeze their tongue to let them realize relationship to opposite sex only exist because of love...hahha i really dont believe on that,im weird? well oh yeah i am, and also extraordinary...where on earth did i get that?! haha i got that from my very best friends...and they are men! yeah they have their girlfriends already but me,im still a bachelor...

simply because i choose so...so what? im happy anyways, i got to spend my time pampering myself, my family and my very best friends...i dont want to waste time clinging around with some men whom you're not sure if they were the ones for you...oh comm'n! cant manage to take that...

they say, how would i know if it will work out or not i dont even trying,well i just thought so...

and i dont want to test my future , i dont wanna mess up with my life, and i dont wanna regret the test...

im a coward? well if thats what people say and that makes them happy haha let them suit to what they think 

for me its all crap to be given such attention... i'll do what i do, say what i think, that makes me a cool feeling that i gotta let out and utter what i want to without even lying, you know i see people always tell lies just to please themselves , how was that? for me it doesn't make any sense...

But in our life their is a certain time that we ought to meet people that reflects different colours 

at this point in my life i haven't been in a world that makes my head spin but i guess i still refuse to because its very unnecessary...its not my cup of tea that because my colleague have their own relationship i will jump into it also nha-ah...thats a no no for me...  they can say whatever they want...still i wont take a hazard move just to do something i know its not so me...i love kit-kat but im not a copy cat hahah ^^ see the difference even if it rhymes... my golly! i wanna venture more new horizon... work in different fields next year...live freely... just what i really wanted to do... 

sometimes its really hard to be a bachelor... its not because you envy people but its hard because :

* people think somethings wrong with you,even if theres nothing

* no one ask you if your ok,but not lonely

* you cant stand to listen to a love song 

* its just it keeps pissing me off the way people ask me and all of that stuff that i keep on telling them, on and on again and again , why dont they just understand that i dont have anyone by me grrrr

* telling the people the same answer over and over and over again

* most painful of all, rejected by people because i cant sway to their trips in life, i cant keep pace with their topic and life because im different i cant love back so they just simply forget we once are friends...i just dont think they'd understand

well, im feeling blue right now, tears may ran down like a razor but nha-ah its really the typical  me...i just felt like this when i talked about my so called friends not to mention my real best friends who never leave me alone even if they have their gf already... but life must go on...and i just gotta go on with my so called tour n life ... towards success! please bottoms up bottoms up... 

u know its Saturday today, every weekend i always sleep late because its the only night that i can watch all my movie tapes , cant do this on weekdays cause work... so i love Saturday nights...im breaking dawn till dusk always...just to watch dvd's and i dont know it makes me feel light hehe ^^ i can do whatever i want and when i watch movies i could feel theres something in me escapes from the stress of working the whole week...at least i gotta do what i want...then sleep...lying in bed and no need to wake up so early because its Sunday after Saturday hahah how was that man! im so excited to go home...by the way i love this new found song...i will share some of the lines ok...:

I knew I wanted you the first time that I saw you walk by
That I need you forever when your eyes met mine
I loved you the first time I heard you speak my name
You'd be the beauty in my life, always

it may sound to you a love song but i love this because its not a typical oh la la love song...hahah i love music you cant take that from me...i just dont love love song that are pity to the bones...hope you get it right,cause im always misunderstood by people who acts they know me but really not... and it really gives me a grit that they assume to know me but they dont barely understand what i simply say,people are too literal that they just listen to what they say they forgot to understand what they intend to listen...

to wrap up everything... counting blues to end the day...gotta go baby blog...see ya tonight...

unfinished business

the best i ever had is that when i was going trough all of that trials...

im a woman with a degree of computer studies but ended up working in a tourism field...its quite a very new horizon, it isnt what i was really wanted to do and wanted at all...

but i started to like what i was doing with...but i can see the difference between what i like and what i love the most doing...i gotta like my work but i dont love it at all...i cant see my self doing this my entire life..so now i decided to pursue my dreams, i may leave this kind of job but its one of the best thing i ever experience in my life, i was polished by this work, i know lots of stuff now, i manage to adopt to different kinds of situation because im not used at it before.
before i finished my studies im a naive lady, candid and vulnerable, nice, yet im so numb to people around me, im heartless i dont feel anything towards people...i dont know why,maybe im just like this
but im a happy person i just dont trust people directly and as other does to other people in their life...
im happy and contented to know i have good friends and family around me, i dont ask for something that is not before me...im very candid that other take it as an advantage because im vulnerable but now im grown up, knows how to react but still i hide what i really does feel towards something...they say they know me, yet i laugh inside because they only see the poker side of me, i want a person that will make me smile even not saying something , they ask me about love? well i havent seen one yet that shines even if sorounded by handsome and pretty people...and as i was saying i really love a person that has a strong affirmation to himself...that i cannot break and that could make me realize im wrong at some point in my life but right in a way i decided it...
i've written this write ups yesterday but i ended this today...enough of this already hahahha kinda tired sobbing  but its really not like hat i had said earlier...
muaaah gonna write more from me...hope everyone likes it this time around...love...love...love...^^

divulge the feminine side

both fem...

i love this two cause its reflects the feminine side of me...love the roses 

im happy at last i already synchronize my accounts cant have a hustle in opening both...or the myspace and mtv...im so high even if still im testing if it would last...

im looking forward to write more stuff that is valuable hahah i know i haven't post something more interesting this past few days but i'll promise i'll  work on that tonight...i'll think for a much better topic to divulge here i just love the ambiance now...even if tis rainging outside...phew...coldie aftenoon...

personality distorted

SMOKEY ROSE

If this could have been an art to a person maybe that man knows to divulge a lil'bit from me...i really love to make something not so common about me...like blogging i can say this is really my refuge my haven... 

this smokey rose simply symbolizes how i differ from what people used to think about me, i know they say im good but i also know other took my personality as strong as they cant take it anymore,something just like that! of course we cant please everybody and pleasing someone isn't my cup of tea anyways...

and the struggles i've been trough all the rough roads from the past that leads me where i am now and molds my strong personality  now, all of that makes me the person who i am today...

set all that aside, here is my piece the one above and this distorted rose hahah i love the effects

distorted Smokey Rose 

i didnt know i will make something like this that will be relevant to  my personality...it just keep popping u know...^^