DECIPHERING THE TRUE VALUE

Morning!...maybe this will be the longest post i will be writing...its all in here...iv'e think about it last night...and the reason why iv;e slept so early haha i think its just 6:45 pm and wooossssh i crawl to my bed and slept so early, and ended up waking so late...cuddle with my blanket ^^ i wake up today at 7:35 am! and i was like WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH IM LATE!

thanks to my momma she woke me up! 

time really flows by so fast that we wont know we've grown so much...mentally, physically and emotionally... indeed! realize so much...about all the things i should have thought before... i dont write annoying things here because im not the kind of person who talk about sad or things that are sooooooooo negative... i dont want negative vives... even when im dealing on the daily basis  it can be seen on me, i dont want negative stuffs...im also very transparent on some ways, but i also managed to hide the true me...yeah im transparent on some ways but neither of that transparency helps other people to know me, i didn't know if there's one person who truly understand my swings and wants in life...before i have someone who understand me a lot and she knows exactly who am i, but then she flew away from us...shes my bestfriend...and i treasure everything i can recall of her...then as i was dealing with my self, then i graduate from school, and so i got my job now...

i erase the line that i should have post here...maybe because there are things left unsaid...^^ 

i have shared here about my love life...it was a total regal moment for me, because for the first time i was in love! but then that was not the main point...my cousins didn't allow me to feel that...but they cant dictate what someone should feel towards someone...but then i understand them cause they were just worried  about me feeling sorry for myself...you know also that the person i love dont know i have feelings towards him....and his my friend, so they were worried i might get used to the new feeling iv'e been trough...on the other hand iv'e over come it the day after i burst out of motions...hahah that was also very unforgetable, like i was so in love with the person yesterday then given up the chance today...and totally forget about it in the future...

and that might be the right thing to do...loving someone whom you know you dont exist in his world a bit its kinda awful when you let yourself get drown with the emotions...gosh im so thankful i can handle my emotions very well, kudos to myself! my shield really works at times i need it...im a tough person, when it comes to dealing life i dont have that so much experience specially on love basis...

for me having a lovelife is not a basis on someone's happiness...just like im saying a man is not the basis if a woman is happy and contented? cause if i can do it why cant others dont...or they were just too much having fun collecting the boys they wanted...it was a total eeewwwwww for me...maybe im going over board when i say that but thats my opinion anyways...
maybe i am not blessed with a love life like others do, but im blessed with having my family as my support, my friends who never fails to reach out and never ran out of fun momentum...
i was thinking before that because im so tough at men, thats why i deserve to be single until now, but then i realize thats not the reason, then i have a covenant to God...about this im sure nothing more and less about it... so when i feel that im in love already for the first time i was thinking he might be given by me by God... but i guess it was a test if i can handle it, and yeah i did, even if it was not very interesting but i was DID happy about it...my first love is the person i never thought i would fall to...and sadly the worst part on that is that i never had a chance to tell the person i love him, before the love grows and before i get hurt,well hahah im hurting right now, cause iv'e never start the journey but hen i know already were not meant for each other, his just too good to be true for me...^^ well, thats how ironic life can be...so i decided to end the year happy instead of feeling the loose of this person...i will still love him...haha ^^ so martyr you know!
but as i what'd said before, its very enough that i get the chance to go with him, and stare at his face... ^^ that stealing moment is very regal! promise ! im super blushing thats why  dont look at him very often im afraid he might caught me and that would be very awkward! ohmygosh!!!!!
ever night  i always get excited to read his message...even if i always get disappointed because his not the type of person who will text non sense stuff...and im too lame waiting for someone who will me knowing at that very moment his working already...he works at night...basis are, our world cant collide...it always repel...^^ well too much of this already... the important thing is i will end my year happy! ^^ haha stay living healthy and saty single!...cheers to my sadness! happiness! and young!

favorite bread ever! 

whenever im okay or feel bitter...all i can do is pamper myself...eat...eat...eat...sleep...and watch movies...so im loving and enjoying it! now i will cast the spell! no more sadness!
im tagging my lines back then...LIVE HEALTHY & HAPPY!